The whole art of clay-pigeon shooting
lies in the timing.
The trick is when I say "pull" --
No!
Sorry.
My fault. Should have warned you there.
Weren't you ready?
Oh, no, it's all right.
I say, they go out jolly quickly, don't they?
Do you want a go?
No, I think I'll learn the shooting bit first.
Can you reload that, Pamela?
Oh, I don't know.
They go in here, don't they?
Shall I, miss?
I'm perfectly capable, thank you very much.
Well, we'll leave the reloading for a minute.
You see, when I say "pull" --
Morning, Hastings! Lovely day!
Morning, General!
Morning, ladies!
-Morning! -Morning!
Well, now, Kitty, why don't you have a try?
If you don't practice, you won't be ready for the championship.
It's all set for the 14th.
Ah, morning, Mr. Russell. Racing, eh?
Good morning, Mr. Poirot.
Bonjour, Captain Fowler.
Oh! Good morning, M. Poirot.
Bonjour, Mlle. Morgan.
You're in good voice, eh?
Thanks to your Captain Hastings, Mr. Poirot.
He's got us all organized.
Captain Hastings is very good at that.
I thought the general was awfully good last night,
with his recitations from Swinburne.
Oh, yes, the general recites poetry with true military vigor.
Perhaps your niece can also be persuaded to entertain us
one evening.
Perhaps she will, Mr. Poirot, perhaps she will.
Excuse me.
John?
Of course, the actual wound I got was ludicrously minor.
I felt a complete fraud.
I'm sure it wasn't minor.
Oh, I assure you it was.
Mind you, I was convinced I was going to die.
But that's only because I'm a coward.
Oh, John.
Oh, good morning, General.
Morning, Reverend.
Good morning, General Forbes.
Morning, Miss Henderson.
Fine day -- little breezy.
John?
Oh, good morning, M. Poirot.
Mme. Clapperton.
Have you seen John?
Ah, yes, he is on the foredeck, madame.
Oh, shall I?
Sit down, M. Poirot.
I didn't see you at dinner last night.
No, no, no.
It was just a shade choppy, of course.
Well, no, I was --
Fortunately, I am an excellent sailor.
The one thing I must not do is overtire myself.
I live so intensely, if you know what I mean, M. Poirot.
Oh, yes.
As a matter of fact,
I nearly wore myself out as a girl in the war.
My hospital.
You've heard about my hospital.
Of course, I had nurses and matrons and that sort of thing,
but I actually ran it.
Your vitality is formidable, dear lady.
"You're so alive, Adeline," they say to me,
but really, M. Poirot,
what would one be if one wasn't alive?
Dead, madame.
I must find my husband.
You won't find sharks in the Mediterranean.
Oh, there you are.
Oh, hello, my dear. I did find you a chair.
Would you like it in or out of the sun?
Not in the sun, if possible.
Ah, right, there you are.
Are you -- Are you going to be warm enough?
I'm freezing.
Oh, well, I'll find...
I'd take a hatchet to that woman if I were her husband.
Bonjour, monsieur.
Ah. How's that?
I knew a woman like that once in Hyderabad.
Absolutely poisonous.
In '87, that was.
And did anyone take a hatchet to her?
No.
Last time I saw her, she was on her third husband.
Oh.
Position is everything.
If you lose your balance,
you could swing round and shoot a hole in the mast -- or worse.
Colonel Clapperton?
Colonel?
Such a soldierly looking man.
Soldierly?
He was in the Guards, wasn't he, General Forbes?
Guards?
Before the war, that fellow was on the music-hall stage.
No.
Fact -- music-hall stage.
War comes along, they start letting anyone in.
Hun drops a stray bomb -- pure good luck --
he goes home with a flesh wound in the arm.
How did he meet Mrs. Clapperton?
Mrs. Clapperton?
Lady Pardot, she was then.
Really?
He got into her hospital somehow.
Did it have anything to do with him being wounded, do you think?
Oh, yes, he had to be wounded.
You should get a bit of exercise, Miss Henderson.
Does you no good sitting around thinking, you know.
No, I know.
Unfortunately, my religion forbids it at this time of year.
Oh.
Right.
I mean, um -- Well.
Adeline.
Oh, hello, Dermot.
I've been trying to talk to you
ever since you both came on board.
I don't see that we've a lot to say to each other, have we?
Oh, surely, after all the...
What do you want?
I was just --
Were you spying on us?
I wanted to clear your trays, ma'am.
Well, get on and do it, then.
I am a happily married woman, General Forbes.
It's her family I feel sorry for.
"No soldier songs," I said, "no Indian love lyrics."
What does she sing?
"The Army of Today's All Right" and the "Kashmiri Love Song."
You can't expect no better from civilians, sir.
We're all civilians now, Bates.
The trouble with a cruise like this
is you're forced to suffer amateur entertainment
night after night.
Oh, well, we rather enjoyed it, didn't we, Molly?
What did you think, Colonel Clapperton?
John would have been quite happy
to sit and listen to that dreadful woman for hours.
He has no taste at all as far as anything artistic goes.
It's true.
Mrs. Tolliver's artistic.
That must be a great solace to you.
We're really looking forward
to seeing the museum in Alexandria tomorrow.
John and I won't be going ashore.
We never bother with antiquities.
One must live in the present, don't you find?
My house has nothing in it older than three years.
I'll have to be selling my car next year, then, darling.
My car... I think, John.
Certainly, my dear. Your car.
Voilà ce qu'on appelle la "pukka sahib."
Twenty past 10:00.
Ah, indeed.
Well, what about bridge?
Bridge?
Yes, bridge.
Come on. We can use the dining table.
Oh, may we join you?
What about you, Clapperton?
Oh, John won't play -- most tiresome of him.
Sorry.
You can join us if you like.
What was your name again?
Tolliver, Mrs. Tolliver.
And I'm her husband -- Mr. Tolliver.
What a clever arrangement.
-A kidnapping! A kidnapping! -Kidnapping!
You're coming with us. It's a kidnapping.
A Clapperton-napping! To the boat deck!
Oh.
Don't be foolish, John.
You'll catch a chill.
Not with us, he won't.
We're hot stuff.
Anyway, there's a moon.
Bonsoir.
Do you ever go down on your knees
and thank God you didn't have any children?
Well, as a matter of fact, we did.
Two -- a little boy and a little girl.
Oh, for heaven's sake, get on and deal.
I know it's the most awful romantic cliché,
but the moon is beautiful, isn't it?
Certainement.
It is like a giant oeuf en cocotte.
M. Poirot.
Honestly, I thought you said you were going to play.
Mademoiselle, I want to ask your advice
on a matter of the English language.
I'm sure you don't need that.
Ah, mademoiselle is too amiable, eh?
But, no, just now,
Mme. Clapperton said that John won't play bridge.
Is not "can't play" the usual term?
She takes it as a personal insult
that he doesn't play, I suppose.
The man was a fool ever to have married her.
Oh, many odious women have devoted husbands, eh?
It is an enigma of nature.
Which is perhaps why the estimable Captain Hastings
has not yet taken the plunge into matrimony.
Matrimony?
You're not entered for the clay-pigeon championship yet,
are you, Miss Henderson?
Uh, no, I don't think I really mean to --
Hastings, can't you talk of something else for once?
No.
No, no, I'd love to talk about the clay-pigeon championship,
but tomorrow, perhaps?
I have some letters to finish
that I want to post in Alexandria.
Good night, Mlle. Henderson.
Good night.
Good night, Miss Henderson.
Good night.
Oh, Hastings, Hastings.
What?
Whatever is the use
of me introducing you to nice young ladies
if all you do is talk about the shooting of the clay pigeons?
But they like it.
You heard what Miss Henderson said --
she'd love to talk about it tomorrow.
Oh, Hastings, Hastings, Hastings.
Now pick a card.
No, don't show me.
Now, remember what the card is and put it back into the pack.
That's good.
Now, just a little shuffle.
Your card.
Geez! Isn't that clever?
I see you enjoy playing cards, monsieur,
even though you do not play bridge.
I have my reasons for not playing bridge.
I'll show you.
Sit down. We'll play one hand.
You can shuffle the cards, Mr. Poirot.
Voilà.
You see, any man who can deal his partner and adversaries
any hand he pleases
had better stand aloof from a friendly game of cards.
But how did you do it?
I mean, it all looked perfectly ordinary.
Ah, the quickness of the hand deceives the eye.
You could go on the stage with that, Colonel Clapperton.
Yes. Quite.
Well, I hope I haven't bored you with my little demonstration.
Goodnight, ladies, gentlemen.
Did I say something wrong?
I don't know, Hastings.
I really don't know.
Oh, we ought to get off now.
You'll come with us, won't you?
You wouldn't let us go ashore by ourselves?
Hey, miss, miss, miss.
Oh! Please go away.
Genuine bits from the tombs of the pharaohs.
I don't want any pharaohs' bits.
You see? Awful things might happen to us.
Well, I certainly don't think you should go alone.
Hooray!
But I'm not sure if my wife feels up to it.
Hooray! I mean, uh -- boo.
She can have a nice, long rest.
Yes.
Well, I'll go and have a word with Adeline.
We'll come with you.
Yes, perhaps we can persuade her to come.
Who's that?
Adeline, my dear, it's John.
The door's locked.
I don't want to be disturbed by the stewards.
Bonjour, ladies.
We're trying to get him to ourselves for the day.
Lure him into the suq.
Cajole him into the casbah.
What about coming ashore?
Certainly not. I've had a very bad night.
I'll stay in bed most of the day.
Well, I think I might go, Adeline.
Oh, do as you like, John, for heaven's sake.
Uh, do you mind if I just come in and get my Baedeker?
Yes, I do mind. I'm not getting out of bed.
Do go away, John, and let me have a little peace.
We can go now.
What about your passport?
In my pocket.
Glory be!
Hey, miss, miss.
No, no, no, please, please, I really must go.
Real amber bits, miss.
Pharaoh's gold, miss.
How much are those amber ones?
300.
No, that's far too much.
Mine's 100, miss.
100 -- give the missus.
Oh, very well. Look, I'll take the amber one.
But after that I really must go.
Here -- clear off, you.
You're not allowed down here.
Cheeky blighter.
Ah, Hastings, are you ready to go?
All set.
Going ashore, General Forbes?
Well, yes, very probably.
I'll see.
See you later.
I think we ought to avoid the usual sort of tourist thing
as much as we can, Poirot.
Good, good. I am absolutely in your hands, Hastings.
Be looking fiercer, savage.
No, no, no, no, no, no, Hastings.
Now you look merely constipated.
It's all very well for you.
This camel's jolly uncomfortable for sitting on.
It's sharp.
Good morning, M. Poirot.
Ah, bonjour, Mlle. Henderson.
Good morning, Captain Hastings.
Oh, good morning.
Like that.
Harder. Ready.
Doesn't he look dashing?
Oh, yes, indeed.
You know, he looks as if he is summoning up the courage
to order the second tea cake.
M. Poirot, have you seen the Clappertons ashore
this morning?
I believe Mme. Clapperton was spending the day in her cabin.
Ah, and what about Colonel Clapperton?
Ah, let me think.
He came ashore -- yes, no, certainly, he came ashore.
It's just that there was some talk last night
of us all coming ashore together.
Ah.
M. Poirot?
Yes, mademoiselle?
Was Colonel Clapperton alone when he came ashore?
Was he alone?
Let me think.
Maybe someone was with him.
Miss Mooney and Miss Cregan perhaps?
Ah, yes, yes, the two little girls, yes.
They're not children, M. Poirot.
Oh, no.
Nor am I.
No.
Ah.
Very good...
I say, Poirot -- look at these pomegranates.
Sorry?
I don't think they like you to touch the fruit,
Captain Hastings.
Oh. Sorry.
M. and Mme. Tolliver, what a pleasant surprise.
Are you alone?
Oh, quite alone, yes.
Oh, that nice General Forbes joined us for a while,
but he had to rush back.
He wasn't feeling at all the thick.
-Gyppy tummy, I dare say. -Oliver.
Now, we were just about to take some lunch.
Would you care to join us?
Lunch?
In a native place, you mean?
I say.
Why not, Molly? Let's give it a go.
Count me out, Poirot.
I think I'd better be getting back to the ship.
Ah, must you desert us, Hastings?
Ah, one or two things to catch up on, you know.
Very well.
M. and Mme. Tolliver and I will see you back on board ship
late afternoon.
Please.
We'll let the two girls go first
because they're the least experienced.
Then it better be General Forbes.
He's an old hand at this sort of competition.
We can't do it in the middle of Alexandria harbor, sir.
Oh, I don't see why not, Bates.
If we shoot in the general direction of the open sea,
there's nothing much parked out there.
Moored, sir.
Moored?
Well, I'm sure the harbor master
will have something to say about it, sir.
Started in India, you know.
Beg your pardon?
Had its origins in India -- clay pigeons.
Oh, really?
In the 13th century.
Gosh, it was bows and arrows then.
And they didn't have that catapult thing.
Just had these fellows with tremendously strong arms.
Oh, best to leave her to it, I think.
Yes, she probably will.
Come along, Pamela!
Ah, Mlle. Mooney and the Colonel Clapperton,
you had an enjoyable day ashore, I trust?
-Absolutely. -Good.
Come on, Pammy!
I'll see you at dinner, perhaps.
I hope so.
Adeline?
Adeline, my dear?
Adeline?
Huh. It's locked.
You do not have your key?
No. I'll find a steward.
Ah.
-Ah, Poirot. -Uh, steward!
We seem to be having some trouble
with the clay-pigeon championship.
Really?
It was originally planned, you see, to take place on the 14th,
but it seems that we dock at Haifa on the 13th.
And that's one of those places
where we more or less have to go ashore and look at the ruins
while they revictual the ship.
Now, that leaves the 15th, the 16th, and the 18th.
The 17th is no good
because that's the night of the captain's party.
Oh, my God!
My God!
She -- She's dead.
Fetch the captain, mon ami.
Look at this, Poirot.
One of the souvenir sellers must have dropped it.
The devils.
Colonel Clapperton, what a tragedy.
Can you help us with this, Mr. Poirot?
I want to avoid involving the Egyptian police, if possible.
Yes, Captain, perhaps I can.
Is anything missing,
as far as you can tell, Colonel Clapperton?
My wife always keeps -- kept --
always kept some cash
in the second drawer of the dressing table.
It seems to have gone.
How much was that?
Between £20 and £30.
Anything else?
Her jewels.
There weren't very many.
Most of them were in the captain's safe.
Well, perhaps you could let us have a description of them?
Well, I'll try.
I don't know if I can remember them very exactly.
No, no, no, no.
I know the headband thing she was wearing last night has gone.
What can you tell me about this?
That's not my wife's.
You're quite sure?
Quite. She'd never wear a thing like that.
It was found on the floor, between the two beds.
Then someone must have dropped it there.
Would you say that your wife had any enemies?
Certainly not.
Colonel Clapperton, you have been most helpful.
Thank you very much.
May I offer you my condolences.
If there's anything we can do, Colonel...
Thank you, Captain.
There's nothing.
Nothing can bring Adeline back again.
Good God.
Murdered, General Forbes.
Good God above.
You were acquainted with Mme. Clapperton before this voyage,
I think?
I knew Adeline when she was Lady Pardot.
I knew her before that, when she was Adeline French.
I was ADC to her father back in '92, when she was 7 years old.
Good God, I can hardly believe it.
I was in love with her for years.
She was not always the silly woman she became.
You must not incriminate yourself, monsieur.
Incriminate myself? How could I?
M. and Mme. Tolliver tell me
that you came back to the ship before lunch.
What of it?
Saying that you were ill?
No.
All right, no.
I came back to talk to Adeline.
I hadn't seen her for 17 years,
not since the war, just after Pardot died.
I thought there might be a chance for me yet.
But I didn't, uh...
I mean, she was in mourning.
Of course, that didn't deter a man like Clapperton.
You came back to the ship to talk to Mme. Clapperton?
Yes.
Tell me what happened when you got back to the ship.
Well, nothing happened.
I went to her cabin and knocked, but she didn't reply.
So I went back to mine...
and had a nap.
Well, what do you say, Mr. Poirot?
One cannot hurry the little gray cells, Captain.
You rounded up the souvenir wallas yet?
Yes.
Actually, one of them identified Miss Henderson
as having bought an amber necklace.
Really?
Come in.
Yes, Bates?
I've carried out my examination of the body, sir.
And?
Oh.
The deceased died from a knife wound to the upper thorax, sir.
Good God, Bates, we can all see that for ourselves.
I'm sorry, sir, but I've only got me first-aid book,
haven't I?
At what time did she die, M. Bates?
Oh, it's difficult to say, sir,
what with the weather being so warm and --
Never mind about that, Bates.
What we want to know is -- what time was Mrs. Clapperton killed?
About 10:00 this morning, sir.
10:00, eh?
Give or take an hour or two, sir.
Oh, dear God.
It's all right, Kitty.
You weren't to know, old thing.
Who is it?
It is I, Hercule Poirot.
All right, Kitty.
Oh, hello, M. Poirot.
Bonsoir, Mlle. Cregan.
May I come in for a minute, please?
Well...
I-I only have one question.
No, it's just that Kitty's making such a blessed racket.
Oh, dear, dear.
She blames herself, you see.
Well, and me.
But how can she blame herself?
Well, we did say some pretty dreadful things about her.
My dear Mlle. Cregan,
if everyone on board
who had said unpleasant things about Mme. Clapperton
were to make as much noise as your friend,
this vessel would become a danger to shipping.
There!
You hear that, old girl?
What was the one question?
Oh, it is quite simple, really.
You both left the ship this morning at 9:30
with the Colonel Clapperton, yes?
You know we did. You saw us.
Précisément.
So, please tell me --
was Colonel Clapperton with you for the whole day,
until you got back to the ship at 4:00 this afternoon?
Yes, absolutely, every minute of the day.
He doesn't think --
Oh, no!
Ohh.
Every minute of the day, you say?
Absolutely.
Well...
Yes?
Well, we went to a café for some tea at about 12:00.
Uh-huh.
And he -- Colonel Clapperton, that is --
Well, he went to the, you know, for a couple of minutes.
Ah, I understand.
But just for a couple of minutes, you say.
Well, one doesn't time it.
Oh, no, you don't!
You've got one or two questions to answer, my lad,
unless I'm very much mistaken.
I didn't kill her.
You had her jewelry.
Jewelry?
She was rich.
What did it matter to her?
Come, M. Skinner!
Mme. Clapperton is dead!
You are caught red-handed by my colleague, Captain Hastings,
trying to sell the jewelry of Mme. Clapperton!
You admit that you let yourself into her cabin --
She was dead already.
I shouldn't have took it, not when I saw she was dead.
If I'd known there'd be trouble...
Do you believe him?
Yes, I think I do.
Me too.
So, we're back to the souvenir hawkers.
Why do you not consider one of the passengers, Hastings?
The passengers?
Well, who?
Colonel Clapperton?
Got a watertight alibi.
General Forbes?
What about Mlle. Henderson?
Really? No.
Well, I think perhaps she has the motive, no?
She's a lady, Poirot.
And you think, mon ami, that ladies do not commit murder?
Ladies don't get found out.
Mme. Clapperton had been dead for at least five hours
when she was found.
A small amount of money and some jewelry had been taken.
A string of beads was on the floor, near to her bed.
The door was locked and the key missing.
And the hatch which gives onto the deck was open.
What are you driving at, Poirot?
Mme. Clapperton had locked the door from the inside.
We actually heard her say so herself.
If Mrs. Clapperton could lock the door,
she could unlock it, too, I suppose.
Précisément, precisely,
which leads us to the inescapable conclusion
that Mme. Clapperton unlocked the door
and let in the murderer.
Miss Henderson, I hope you don't mind me asking,
but you bought an amber necklace yesterday, didn't you?
Yes, I did.
How did you know that?
The captain mentioned it.
He just happened to mention it.
Would you mind if I had a look at it?
I'm afraid I've lost it.
I must have dropped it somewhere, put it down.
I don't know.
Yes. Right.
Of course.
I thought Mrs. Clapperton
a very unpleasant woman.
In fact, I don't think anyone on board ship really liked her,
but, surely, who would have reason to kill her?
Mademoiselle, it is the opinion
of every person on board the ship
that the Colonel Clapperton would have been quite justified
in taking a hatchet to her.
Now, that was an expression I actually heard used.
But he had an alibi.
He was onshore all day with the two girls,
and he did not return to the ship until 4:00 that afternoon,
by which time Mme. Clapperton had been dead for many hours.
Seems to me we're back to General Forbes
as our only suspect.
Ah, bonsoir, Mlle. Morgan.
I want, please, to ask a favor of your niece.
Our niece?
Very well.
Ismene?
Good evening, Ismene.
I want to borrow somebody from you, if I may.
Uh... ladies and gentlemen...
tonight I shall offer you a garland
from our national poet, Mr. Rudyard Kipling,
starting with "The Ladies."
"I've taken my fun where I've found it,
I've rogued an' I've ranged in my time.
I've 'ad my pickin' o' sweet'earts.
An' four o' the lot was prime.
One was an 'arf-caste widow.
One was a woman from Prome.
One was the wife of a jemadar-sais.
An' one is a girl at 'ome.
"Now --"
Pardon me, Mr. Russell.
Oh, that's all right.
Uh -- "Now I aren't no 'and with the ladies.
-For, takin' 'em all --" -I'm sorry.
I-I have to make an announcement.
If you'll be good enough to sit down, sir.
You come and join us, Mr. Russell.
Ladies and gentlemen,
you all know what a tragedy occurred yesterday.
And I am sure you will all want to cooperate
in bringing the perpetrator of the foul crime to book.
As you know, we are fortunate enough to have on board with us
Mr. Hercule Poirot,
who is probably known to you all
as a man who has wide experience in such matters.
I hope you'll listen carefully to what he has to say.
Mr. Poirot.
Thank you, Captain Fowler.
Mesdames et messieurs,
what I am about to do may surprise you a little.
It may occur to you that I am eccentric, perhaps mad.
Ah, you may say,
"The little Belgian detective is taking leave of his rocker," eh?
But I can assure you, behind my madness is,
as you English say...
method.
So...
Voilà.
A suitcase.
How uninteresting.
Nothing is less interesting than a suitcase, yes?
And you are right, except...
suitcases have contents.
It's a doll.
Yes, a doll.
Except this doll...
is an important witness...
to the truth of who killed...
Mme. Clapperton.
But how is it this doll can tell us what it knows, huh?
But this is a doll... that can speak.
You have not heard of dolls that can speak?
Yes, of course you have.
All we have to do is put this doll back in the suitcase --
ah -- where we cannot see her.
She does not like to be seen, this little lady.
Do you, ma petite?
-No! -Ah.
Now, can you tell us anything
about the death of Mme. Clapperton?
What is it, John?
Door's locked.
The door's locked.
Don't want to be disturbed by the stewards.
I don't want to be disturbed by the stewards.
Y-You --
Stop him, somebody.
Yes.
Take him to my quarters.
Ladies and gentlemen, if you would clear the room.
Thank you, ladies and gentlemen.
Did I do it right, Mr. Poirot?
Oh, yes... ma petite.
It was you, General, who gave me a valuable hint
with your mention of the music-hall stage.
I puzzle, eh?
I think.
And then, the evening before the crime,
Colonel Clapperton pretended to give himself away.
He wanted us to believe that he was a conjurer
because then it would never occur to us
that he was, in fact, a ventriloquist.
And that's what he did
when you heard him talking to Mrs. Clapperton
through her cabin door.
Précisément.
And by then, she was already dead.
Excuse me.
What about the necklace on the floor?
Was it Miss Henderson's?
No, it was put there to make us think
that some native thief was the killer.
But that it cast suspicion on someone who really cared for him
was the cruel irony.
Pardon.
I am sorry, mademoiselle.
He didn't do it for me.
It was those girls' youth.
It made him feel his slavery.
He wanted to be free before it was too late.
We all have such dreams.
When did you guess it was him?
His self-control was too perfect.
No matter how galling was the conduct of his wife,
it never seemed to touch him.
That either meant that he was so used to it
that it no longer stung,
or else he knew his bondage would soon be over.
It was a cruel, dirty trick you played, M. Poirot.
I do not approve of murder.
Mademoiselle.